The Page of The Almighty: Under Intense Construction | |||||||||||||||||
| Why I chose this form of communication: | |||||||||||||||||
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As the most powerful being in the universe, I often find myself agrivated with the effort of you mortals to ignore me. For a long time I contemplated how to deal with this problem. I considered the typical locus plagues, bleeding oriface diseases, worldwide floods, giant meteors, and whatnot. But then I realized, it would all be for naught if you still had your precious internet. You don't think I see you down here wasting years of you lives staring at captive eletrons for days on end. Okay, fine I don't but if I wanted to I could. I could. No, really. Anyway, I decided the best way to destroy the internet was to become a part of it. Yeah, I know what you're thinking: "He's trying to control the internet by getting a site with Fortunecity? What an idiot!" That's what you're thinking isn't it? Fool! Thats what I want you to think. If its not what you were thinking then you were thinking about sex. I couldn't tell which. | ||||||||||||||||
| The Ten Commandments I MEANT to give: | |||||||||||||||||
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1. You shall worship and idolize me like the God that I am 2. I shall never go out of style, neither will disco 3. Sex is good. Group sex is better. 4. Free will is not an option (really messed up on this one) 5. Violence is always tasteful 6. Clothing is forbidden 7. The body must not exceed a ratio of 75% body fat: 25% muscle 8. Powerade is The Almighty's beverage of choice 9. My skills of procrastination are second only to my lack of organization 10. NEVER fall into the rut of conformity (unless it involves worshiping me, then its okay) | ||||||||||||||||
| Hate vs. Love | |||||||||||||||||
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